No jokes please

Ananova:

Tailor-made condoms

Individually tailored condoms that are anatomically designed to fit each penis perfectly are going on sale in Germany.

Businessman Oliver Gothe, 36, is behind the Cologne-based company Lebenslust (Lust for Life), which has invented a system to make personalised prophylactics.

Using a machine that measures each member to produce a unique 3D computer image, Gothe then lets his customers choose the thickness of the condom and add extra details.

Gothe said: "These condoms will fit so well you will hardly notice you are wearing one. We can make them wafer thin or fist thick and 'engrave' them with your signature wrapped around the base."

The service will cost around £600 for a "large but an as yet unspecified number" but Gothe insists the price is worth it as his condoms are comfier and safer.

I wonder how much he charges just to use "a machine that measures each member to produce a unique 3D computer image"? I tend to question his statement that a "fist thick" condom will be more comfortable. Possibly more comfortable than a traffic cone but even that must depend if one is a giver or a receiver.